It’s Official

It’s official.  I have fibromyalgia.  I’m going to start doing some research on it.  I have a friend who has it and he says it’s not always a life sentence of pain and suffering.  Let’s hope not.

Hope you are all well.  I’ll post again soon.  I just need some time to collect myself…



33 thoughts on “It’s Official

  1. julesasmrspersonality says:

    I’m sorry, you are in my prayers as always. I think all aspects of affairs are terribly unfair, but the actual physical illness it can cause is unimaginable. We did not sign up for this! (Hugs) Jules

  2. Foolish Woman says:

    Sorry to hear you’ve been given that diagnosis. I really hope you’ll be able to find treatments and coping strategies that will make life easier.

    You’re probably not feeling very strong just now but think what you’ve managed to deal with recently – and take courage from the knowledge that you are a strong and resourceful woman and you’ll find a way through this too. In the meantime – you’re allowed to be angry at the unfairness of it all. Life really does stink sometimes.

    You’re in my thoughts.

  3. Aimer Shama says:

    I don’t know what to say but may God bless you and keep you and watch over your health. Sorry.

  4. backonmyown says:

    I’m thinking of you as you take on this latest challenge.

    • Not Over It says:

      That’s a good way to think of it, Pat – my latest challenge. I’m going to fight it, no question about that. I’m just finding it a little hard right now to get a grip on it all.

      As always, I so appreciate you. Thank you.


  5. aaroncrj says:

    Dear DJ:

    I am so sorry to learn that you are having to deal with this type of pain on top of all the other pains you have felt. I will keep you in my thoughts, where you have been for some time. I am certain that with your strength of character and feisty personality you won’t let this condition beat you.

    Though I haven’t had much time to post recently I do try to sneak in a visit or two to your blog each week. As always you continue to inspire me and help me deal with some of the messier aspects of my relationship with my wife.

    Please do take good care of yourself and let others take care of you, too.

    Have a great and relaxing Easter weekend!


    • Not Over It says:

      Aaron! I hope things are going well for you. You are in my thoughts as well.

      Thank you for reminding me that I can be strong and feisty – don’t much feel like that right now, but with the help of my friends here I am turning a corner.

      And I almost forgot that it’s Easter – my goodness. I need to pull myself together. Happy Easter!

  6. Robin says:

    I will be thinking about you! Take care of yourself. Robin

  7. I’m so sorry to hear this. It seems you have already filled your quota in the pain department. You’re in my thoughts…

    • Not Over It says:

      Thank you JAMA. I have been feeling defeated by it all, but I must remember that there are so many whose stories are so much worse… I feel truly blessed to have friends here who encourage me.


  8. Axl says:

    The emotional stress that accompanies an affair often turns up physically months or years later. I wish you the best and take care of yourself. I hope you have a wonderful support system to aid in this difficult time.

    • Not Over It says:

      Thank you, Axl. My eldest daughter and her family live in my downstairs apartment, and we all help each other through everything. I told her she was too young to get married at 23, but she and her husband have both become a blessing. But although they know about my husband’s affair, I don’t share much of my journey with them because she is my husband’s daughter, after all. My friends here in our blogging community are a great support in that regard.

      Hope you are well.

  9. DX fibro says:

    Have you thought about an exercise program to ease the pain of fibromyalgia. I did it and you can too. Take care of yourself and get well.

    • Not Over It says:

      Thank you so much for writing, DX fibro! I took a peek at your blog and I’m sure I will learn a lot from it. I exercise quite a bit already and still managed to develop fibromyalgia, so I am very interested in the type of exercise you do. I’ll be by to visit again very soon.


  10. I’m sorry to learn you have another challenge to overcome. There’s no doubt in my mind that you have the strength to do it. It’s good that the doctors were able to identify the problem. Please allow yourself to do what it takes to treat it. I hope you’re making your well-being your number one priority. You deserve to spoil yourself with whatever it takes to get better. Never forget that! I’m thinking about you, DJ. Take care of yourself.

    • Not Over It says:

      Hey DE – thank you for your encouraging words. I was really depressed for a few days, but thanks to you and all my friends here, I’m done with my pity party now and ready to take it on. I’m sure there will be a lot of false starts and stumbling blocks – I just went shopping with my daughter and I hurt so much now I want to just go to bed for the rest of the evening – but I will keep moving and I will get control over it.

      Thanks again. Hope all is going well for you. I’m thinking about you, too.


  11. AngelWings says:

    I’m sorry to hear this. I pray for your physical and emotional healing. From I have read on here~you are STRONG! You will overcome this! Keep looking forward. Take care of yourself.

    • Not Over It says:

      Thank you, AngelWings. I’m leaning heavily on you all right now as I struggle to find strength through physical and emotional pain. I appreciate the encouragement. .

      Hope you are well.

  12. I’m so sorry to hear the bad news. It does anger me a bit that as a Betrayed Spouse, you not only have to deal with all the emotional pain and constant triggers, but now the betrayal has manifested itself in physical pain. Yes, life is not fair and it sucks. I am here, we are all here for you, as always. If you want to vent, or talk us through your findings or treatment, or just tell us about your day; we are here to support you!

    I’m always thinking about you and your recovery. It’s ok to feel sad or angry, this isn’t a small thing after all. But I also know you’re a strong and resourceful woman and you will get through this. Take care of yourself, think positive thoughts and surround yourself with supportive family and friends. And remember, we are here for you!

    • Not Over It says:

      Oh Fighter, I feel like I keep getting knocked down just as I start to stand tall. Sometimes it’s a struggle just to get out of bed. But I will be fine – better than fine – soon.

      Hope you’re doing ok, after dealing with D-day anniversary and all.


      • Hi DJ,

        You know I really believed that good or bad, things happened to us because we can deal with it and survive it. I know you’ll be better soon.

        My husband had a day off on that dreadful day so I made sure we did something fun as a family. And that we did. I remembered looking at the watch and it was already an hour past that exact Discovery time and I felt so much relief. It was another hurdle that I had to go through and I was glad it went by without much thought. At least while I was with my loved ones.
        Before going to bed, I acknowledged the day to my husband by saying, “It was 2 years ago today that It happened.” I think I also said that we should always be honest and open with each other but if there’s ANYTHING going on behind my back, I would leave him. He said that he will never hurt me again. Amazingly, I didn’t cry that day; even when I was saying those words to him. It was a reminder and a warning I guess.

        Well, 2 years down and I’ll not be looking forward for next year’s. I wonder how we’ll all be a year from now. Hopefully, we will move on from this nightmare once and for all…

        Take care my friend! *hugs*

      • Not Over It says:

        Hi Fighter,

        Somehow I’m not getting notification of your posts even though I follow you. I think I’ll try clicking on “follow” again. I love it how Foolish Woman calls D-day the antiversary, and I’m glad yours was not bad at all.

        I guess we are strong people here in our community, and getting stronger all the time. A year ago I would have said that I was not strong and could not deal with it all. I felt defeated for a long time. But now I am starting to bounce back more quickly. Right now I’m off to exercise class. I have to take medication and put on knee braces to do it because of the fibromyalgia, but I am not going to quit – especially after a 35-year-old student asked me out the other day! That sure boosted my ego! LOL!

        Thank you, Fighter. I always feel better when I read your comments.


  13. Ginger says:

    Hi, I’m new hear but I have PTSD and Fibro too. I just wanted to reach out to you and give you some links on Fibro that took quite a long time for me to find after I was diagnosed. I know you probably have a lot of questions, I know I did. Anyway here are two really helpful and positive sites if you are interested.

    A blog- (search fibromyalgia & cfs) Adrienne is extrodinarly knowledgeable and the comments are often helpful

    A forum- This is my favorite sight, every one is very positive and really helpful. This place make you feel like you aren’t alone.

    Anyway, I hope they help if you decide to check them out. I wish I would have found them when I was first diagnosed, I wouldn’t have felt so alone, depressed, or terrified like some of the other things you might find can make you feel.

    Welcome to the club,

    • Ginger says:

      Ps that should be ‘here’ not ‘hear’ lol, sorry!

    • Not Over It says:

      Hi Ginger, Thank you so much for helping me in finding info on fibromyalgia. It will be a challenge to face it, but I have a good example to follow in you. I don’t know how you do it with 2 young teens to raise.

      It feels like I have to learn how to live life all over again. Geez. At the ripe old age of 53, that’s a big GEEZ.

      Looking forward to getting to know you –

      • Ginger says:

        The most important thing to know is that you will be okay. It probably won’t feel that way sometimes, but you will be. 🙂

  14. Not Over It says:

    To everyone here –

    Thank you all so very much. How lucky I am that we have all found each other. I will read these comments over and over whenever I am down and doubting myself… like right now…


  15. Doug says:

    Sorry to hear of your diagnosis. Take care of yourself!

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