My husband threw a huge fit when he found out I was blogging about his affair. He feels it should be a secret between him and me. But he doesn’t want to talk about it, and I need to talk about it. So for the past month, I’ve been writing back and forth to an online therapist and commenting on other people’s blogs. It has helped tremendously – especially my “conversations” with my therapist. And now I’ve decided to continue my own blog in hopes of recovering even faster.
It has now been five months since D-day, and I still think about the affair most of the time. But the pain is not as intense unless a trigger brings on a flashback. That can send me back to Day 1 for a while, but I can come out of it faster than before. I’ve gotten my appetite back. That’s a big improvement. I might have disappeared off the face of the earth if that didn’t change.
Some people say they did workouts from the very beginning to ease the pain. I could not get up the gumption to start. But now I am walking and going to exercise class and I think I’m going to try some of those exercise videos. I don’t think and I don’t feel the pain when I’m exercising.
Then of course, there’s the power of prayer and praise. I was so angry at God for allowing this to happen to me that I didn’t pray for a long time. But now I see God’s “footprints in the sand.” He has carried me on His shoulders when I couldn’t walk myself. I play praise music and sing with all my heart and soul. It soothes my broken heart.